Bena Mae’s Kitchen: You Can’t Fix Stupid

A Montana police officer who wrote on his Facebook page that there should be a law allowing police to take people to jail for being  “stupid” has resigned.

I agree with the officer’s presumption that the law should allow an arrest for stupidity.  Take, for example, the man who was atop a car ‘mooning’ other cars on a highway in Texas. After falling off the car, he woke up battered and bruised and in serious condition in the hospital. One can only hope the fall knocked some sense into his head.

Note: When robbing a bank, don’t deposit your brains at the door:

Authorities in eastern Pennsylvania say they have identified a suspected bank robber using the wallet he left behind. Bethlehem police say 51-year-old Lloyd Virgil Barclay held up a KNBT branch on Wednesday morning, making off with $800. But Barclay forgot his wallet, which police say he placed on the teller’s counter when he presented a note demanding money.

The wallet had two photo IDs, a Social Security card and a Philadelphia criminal registration card. Police say the ID pictures  match Barclay’s image in surveillance footage. (Smile, you’re on Candid Camera.)

I love the to watch COPS on TV. I admit it, no matter what members of my ‘enlightened’ family say about it. I think it’s funny. And it shows a lot about human nature and the unbelievable and imaginative excuses the perps give when they are caught. Example:

A guy is found with drugs in his pants pocket. He tells the officer the drugs aren’t his because these are not his pants. He doesn’t  know who they belong to or how they came to be on his body.

This guy must work for the government.

But the prize for “Stupid of the Month” goes to this man who prefers doing jail time over living with his unbearable wife:

A man in Lancaster, Pa., said he robbed a bank to go to jail and get away from his overbearing wife. He pleaded guilty in June and the judge sentenced him to three to six years in prison.

Maybe not so stupid after all.

Cinnamon and sugar cookie dough add an interesting (and easy) twist to a dessert that’s great any time of year.

Pumpkin Cheescake Squares

2/3 (18 ounce) package refrigerated sugar cookie dough

1 (10 ounce) package cinnamon chips or 1 tsp ground cinnamon

3 (8 ounce) packages cream cheese, softened

3/4 cup sugar

1 teaspoon pumpkin pie spice

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 cup canned solid-pack pumpkin

3 eggs 

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).

2. Pat the cookie dough into a 9×13 inch baking dish to cover the  bottom, and sprinkle evenly with the cinnamon chips or ground cinnamon. Bake in the preheated oven until the crust is lightly  browned, 12 to 14 minutes.

3. Meanwhile, beat together the cream cheese, sugar, pumpkin pie spice, and vanilla until smooth with an electric mixer. Beat in the pumpkin until combined, then beat in the eggs until the mixture is smooth. Pour into the baking dish, and return to the oven. Continue baking until the center of the mixture has set, 30 to 35 minutes.

4. Cool the baking dish on a wire rack to room temperature, then refrigerate until cold, about 4 hours. Cut into 18 squares to serve.