Bena Mae’s Kitchen: Overcoming writer’s block

Like a polar bear, my mind goes into hibernation about this time every January. Because, let’s face it, January doesn’t lend itself to creativity. So I search for new ideas but no stream of consciousness hits me. “Closed for the Winter” it says. Alas, I’m on my own.
So I sit here thinking of what to write on a blank screen, thinking of nothing more profound than watching the Golden Globes tonight (don’t want to miss the hosts Tina Fey and Amy Poehler), and then there is Downtown Abbey (gotta keep up with the Crawleys) – television in its wisdom put them on opposite each other. And thank goodness, supper will be a warm up of beef stew my daughter-in-law sent me, so the afternoon is free.
Still, no stream of consciousness. When voilá, a solution. Repeat an article from out of the past that was written so long ago that readers may have forgotten it, and if not, is still worth a chuckle or two. So, dear reader, prepare yourself for a laugh the second time around. The story takes place in Utah and comes from a newspaper in New Orleans.
It happened at a ski resort. Conditions were perfect, 12 below zero. One of the women on the ski lift complained to her husband that she was in dire need of a restroom. He told her not to worry, that he was sure there was relief in the form of a powder room when they got to the top of the slope. He was wrong, of course, and the pain did not go away.
So, with time running out, the woman weighed her options. Her husband, picking up on the intensity of the pain, suggested that, since she was wearing an all-white ski outfit, she should go into the woods and no one would even notice, that the white would be more than adequate camouflage.
So she headed for the tree line, began lowering her pants and proceeded to do her thing. But she had her skis positioned in the wrong way. Without warning the woman started skiing backward, out of control. Her derrière was still bare, her pants down around her knees. She continued going backwards, creating an unusual vista for the other skiers.
The woman skied back under the lift and finally collided with a pylon. The bad news was that she broke her arm and was unable to pull up her ski pants. The ski patrol transferred her to the emergency room and while there she met a man with a broken leg.
“So how’d you break your leg?” she asked, making small talk.
“It was the darndest thing you ever saw. I was riding up this ski lift and suddenly I couldn’t believe my eyes. There was this crazy woman skiing backwards down the mountain with her bare bottom hanging out of her pants. I leaned over to get a better look and fell out of the lift.
So how did you break your arm?”

Lazy Cabbage Roll Recipe

2 lbs ground beef, browned
1 c. onion, chopped
29 oz. can tomato sauce
1 head cabbage, chopped
1 c. instant rice (I added a little more because I love rice)
1 tsp. salt
14 oz can beef broth

Combine all ingredients, except broth in an ungreased, deep 9×13 baking pan.
Drizzle with broth; cover with aluminum foil.
Bake at 350 degrees for one hour; uncover and stir.
Cover again and bake 30 additional minutes, or until rice is cooked and casserole is heated through.
Makes 10-12 servings