Bena Mae’s Kitchen: Do these people really vote?

We survived. Maybe my memory is getting short but this winter has been one of the worst I can remember. My area escaped the brunt of it except for a couple of snows and several frigid days that kept my furnace going full blast day and night. But I couldn’t complain when other states were inundated with ice, sleet, snow and below record temps for weeks. I hope the cold weather means fewer insects this summer.
Today is sunny and the temps are coming up which probably means a lot of people are getting out of the house and shaking off the cabin fever that has consumed them for so long. It’s been a slow news week, nothing has broken down in my house so I wait with baited breath for a new crisis. As the Boy Scouts say “Be Prepared” which I stay in “perpetuity” (a new law word I learned and couldn’t wait to use.) Gotta impress someone.
Because I’ve got brain blot today and nothing interesting has happened except the Olympics (and aren’t those kids doing a fine job for the USA), I delved into some old emails and found a funny one that Judy Estep sent me back in August, perfect for filling up a blank screen when my brain has gone bye-bye. Read on and enjoy:

IDIOT SIGHTING
I handed the teller at my bank a withdrawal slip for $400.00
I said “May I have large bills, please”
She looked at me and said “I’m sorry sir, all the bills are the same size.”
When I got up off the floor I explained it to her….

IDIOT SIGHTING
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. ‘Hey,’ I announced to the technician, ‘it’s open!’ His reply: ‘I know. I already got that side.’

ANOTHER IDIOT SIGHTING
We had to have the garage door repaired.
The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a ‘large’ enough motor on the opener.
I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.
He shook his head and said, ‘Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.’ I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4.
He said, ‘NO, it’s not..’ Four is larger than two.’

IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco.
She asked the person behind the counter for ‘minimal lettuce.’
He said he was sorry, but they only had iceburg lettuce.

IDIOT SIGHTING
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it’s safe to cross the street.
I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.
I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
Appalled, she responded, ‘What on earth are blind people doing driving?!

Couldn’t be easier.

Peach Cobbler Dump Cake

2 (16 ounce) cans peaches in heavy syrup
1 (18.25 ounce) package yellow cake mix
1/2 cup butter
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon, or to taste
 
Preheat oven to 375 degrees F.
Empty peaches into the bottom of one 9×13 inch pan. Cover with the dry cake mix and press down firmly. Cut butter into small pieces and place on top of cake mix. Sprinkle top with cinnamon.
Bake at 375 degrees for 45 minutes.