Bena Mae’s Kitchen: Call your doctor immediately

Daily we are assaulted with TV commercials from pharmaceutical companies that say “If your medicine is causing a disturbing side-effect — swelling of the tongue or throat, difficulty in breathing, dizzy spells, rash, or thoughts of suicide,CALL YOUR DOCTOR IMMEDIATELY!”  
What planet are these people on? Don’t they know that you have a better chance of getting through to the Secretary of State than your doctor. Don’t they know that a doctor is surrounded by a phalanx of nurses that protect him better than the president of the US of A with all his security forces? Are they aware that it would take a dozen drones and the military’s crack Seal Team Six that took out bin Ladin to pierce the impenetrable barrier that doctors surround themselves with?
This week I had an issue with my blood thinner medicine. I started noticing ample bruising that covered my arms. They looked like I had been attacked by a warthog. I know that some bruising is common with leukemia, but this was over the top. It occurred to me that I should reduce the dosage of the blood thinner medicine, but I didn’t want to self medicate. I wanted a professional person’s opinion. So I called my trusted pharmacist and explained my problem to her. After evaluating my situation, she said I should call my doctor.
Oh dear God, those are words a patient never wants to hear. It took me the rest of the day and half of the next day to get up the nerve to delve into that netherworld of reaching someone in the doctor’s office. The first thing to tackle was the MENU. You’ve probable had to deal with the MENU in your own transactions, that recording that keeps all human voices from talking to you.
The first thing it asked was my name and date of birth. Then came a long list of questions to make sure I was actually the doctor’s patient; my last appointment, did I need an appointment, my home address and telephone or cell phone number, was this an emergency, and what was the name of my cat. I don’t have a cat.
Finally the recording got around to asking me what my problem was. By this time I had forgotten why I had called. But I finally found my composure and tried to explain that I needed the doctor’s advice on whether I should keep on taking the medicine as he prescribed. I told the unseen voice about my arms and other issues the medicine was causing,
The recording said the doctor’s nurse would call me back. By this time I was so exhausted from the battle with the MENU that I had to lay down, or lie down on the sofa and take deep breaths for fifteen minutes. I felt like Russell Crowe must have felt when he battled the Romans in the arena in “The Gladiator.” Wounded but unbroken. I had survived the MENU.
Three days have passed and I still haven’t heard from the doctor’s nurse. Three times I called the number the recording left me and the phone at the other end just rings and rings and rings. So I took it upon myself to cut down on the blood thinner medicine. I know it’s a risk, but what is a person to do?
I know that a doctor cannot lay his scalpel down and answer my pithy little telephone call. But somewhere in that retinue of nurses is a person who can make a phone call and relate a message from the doctor. In the meantime…….I wait.

QUESADILLAS, a WONDERFUL TASTE OF MEXICAN

1 pound skinless, boneless chicken breast halves – cut into strips
1 tablespoon vegetable oil
1 onion, sliced into strips
2 tablespoons salsa
10 (10 inch) flour tortillas
2 cups shredded Cheddar-Monterey Jack cheese blend

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Spray a cookie sheet with non-stick cooking spray.
In a large skillet, fry the chicken strips in vegetable oil until they are no longer pink. Add the onions and fry (stirring constantly) until they are translucent. Mix in the salsa (you may want to add more to taste).
Place the tortillas between two damp paper towels and microwave on high for 1 minute.
Fill half of 1 tortilla with the chicken mixture and cheese, then fold the tortilla over the full half. Repeat with remaining tortillas and filling. Arrange the quesadillas on a cookie sheet.
Bake the quesadillas in the preheated 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) oven until the cheese has melted. Cut the quesadillas in half.