Bena Mae’s Kitchen: A Little of This and That

First off, I would like to wish brother Don a belated happy birthday. One more year and he will have reached the big 7-0. Then he will find that the years go by as fast as a hound chasing a rabbit.

At the risk of embarrassing him, Don, as a little boy, was as cute as a bug’s ear with his blonde hair, blue eyes and dimples that were deep enough to float a battleship. (There, I’ve done it.) And that ever present baseball cap that he even wore to bed.

I would go even further to list his accomplishments, but as Tempus is Fugiting, I’ll save that for later when I’m asking for a raise. I will say, however, that he had a head full of sense when he married Judy.

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WHEW! What a week for TV viewers. First there was the Republican National Convention, then hurricanes from Gustav to Hannah to Ike to Josephine, and the beginning of the end for the four who are left on Big Brother. Unlike prior years of watching it, I have no favorite among those who are left. Somehow, this years lineup of crazies didn’t evoke the usual animosity from me as in years past. And I’m thinking that Dan may struggle through to the end.

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I just had a horrible thought. Since football season is here, my ears will be bombarded with the University of Tennessee band playing Rocky Top. There’s no getting away from it when you live in Big Orange Country. It’s kinda like the Chinese water torture treatment. At first it doesn’t bother you so much, but after the thousandth time, you feel like going out and buying a gun.

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Last night I had dinner with several friends who meet each Friday at a local restaurant that features ‘all you can eat’ catfish and hushpuppies. The conversation meandered its way to the subject of death and dying and cremation and a whole slew of depressing subjects. One member of our party broke the solemn mood with a story that made us all laugh:

The story goes that an elderly man called the funeral home and said that his wife had just died. So the funeral home sent the hearse to the house to pick up the woman’s body. The two men from the funeral home placed her on a gurney and started down the hill to where the hearse was parked. As they walked down the hill, they stepped in a hole which caused them to jostle the corpse.

This resulted in jarring the woman’s body so much that she sat up immediately and came back to life.

A few months later, she died again. Again the funeral home sent out their hearse to pick her up. As the men carefully made their way down the hill, they heard her elderly husband calling to them from the front porch: “WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!”